Local Act 21: The Bastard Who Cried Wolf!

"There once was a shepherd boy who was bored as he sat on the hillside watching the village sheep. To amuse himself he took a great breath and sang out, "Wolf! Wolf! The Wolf is chasing the sheep!"

The villagers came running up the hill to help the boy drive the wolf away. But when they arrived at the top of the hill, they found no wolf. The boy laughed at the sight of their angry faces.

"Don't cry 'wolf', shepherd boy," said the villagers, "when there's no wolf!" They went grumbling back down the hill.

Later, the boy sang out again, "Wolf! Wolf! The wolf is chasing the sheep!" To his naughty delight, he watched the villagers run up the hill to help him drive the wolf away.

When the villagers saw no wolf they sternly said, "Save your frightened song for when there is really something wrong! Don't cry 'wolf' when there is NO wolf!"

But the boy just grinned and watched them go grumbling down the hill once more.

Later, he saw a REAL wolf prowling about his flock. Alarmed, he leaped to his feet and sang out as loudly as he could, "Wolf! Wolf!"

But the villagers thought he was trying to fool them again, and so they didn't come.

At sunset, everyone wondered why the shepherd boy hadn't returned to the village with their sheep. They went up the hill to find the boy. They found him weeping.

"There really was a wolf here! The flock has scattered! I cried out, "Wolf!" Why didn't you come?"

An old man tried to comfort the boy as they walked back to the village.

"We'll help you look for the lost sheep in the morning," he said, putting his arm around the youth, "Nobody believes a liar...even when he is telling the truth!"

Mesej yang cuba disampaikan dalam cerita nie cukup jelas..." Nobody believes a liar..even when he is telling the truth!'...but cuba kita tgk cerita nie dari perspektif yang berbeza...Budak lelaki nie buat salah kali pertama...dan ble orang kampung datang and sound dier, mereka memberi peluang kepada mamat nie untuk berubah..tidak mengulangi perkara yang sama...namun begitu, kerana mamat nie begitu celaka, dier buat lagi skali...dan akhirnya tak de orang yang percaya kata-kata kosong dier

So, apa yang aku cuba nk sampaikan kat sini adalah isu "giving chance". Ble people assume someone tu dh berubah, diorang letak "trust" diorang skali...coz diorang percaya on giving a second chance...tapi ble sumone mcm mamat sengal dalam crita diatas blew it up..they won't be another chance for him...coz dier dh sia-siakan chance pertama and suka2 hati jahanamkan the second one...ad pulak tu yg dh diberi 10-15 chances...but still..he blew it up...mmg betul orang tua2 cakap.." PELUANG HANYA DATANG SEKALI JE"..and what goes after that dh tak sama dgn the first one...sbb it won't come with trust anymore...aku nk pinjam satu quotation from sapa aku tak igt..tapi it sound more or less like this..

" IF EVERYONE DESERVE A SECOND CHANCE, WHO WILL APPRICIATE THE FIRST ONE ?"

Local Act 20 : 'Till The End

I just want to see you
When youre all alone
I just want to catch you if I can
I just want to be there
When the morning light explodes
On your face it radiates
I cant escape
I love you till the end

I just want to tell you nothing
You dont want to hear
All I want is for you to say
Why dont you just take me
Where Ive never been before
I know you want to hear me
Catch my breath
I love you till the end

I just want to be there
When were caught in the rain
I just want to see you laugh not cry
I just want to feel you
When the night puts on its cloak
Im lost for words dont tell me
All I can say
I love you till the end

The Pogues..

Local Act 19 : What use is music?

What Use Is Music?

Why on earth should anyone want to learn such things? Geometry is practical–for building pyramids, for instance–but of what use is musical knowledge? Here is one idea. Each child spends endless days in curious ways; we call this play. A child stacks and packs all kinds of blocks and boxes, lines them up, and knocks them down. What is that all about? Clearly, the child is learning about space! But how on earth does one learn about time? Can one time fit inside another? Can two of them go side by side? In music, we find out! It is often said that mathematicians are unusually involved in music, but that musicians are not involved in mathematics. Perhaps both mathematicians and musicians like to make simple things more complicated, but mathematics may be too constrained to satisfy that want entirely, while music can be rigorous or free. The way the mathematics game is played, most variations lie outside the rules, while music can insist on perfect canon or tolerate a casual accompaniment. So mathematicians might need music, but musicians might not need mathematics. A simpler theory is that since music engages us at earlier ages, some mathematicians are those missing mathematical musicians.

Most adults have some childlike fascination for making and arranging larger structures out of smaller ones. One kind of musical understanding involves building large mental structures out of smaller, musical parts. Perhaps the drive to build those mental music structures is the same one that makes us try to understand the world. (Or perhaps that drive is just an accidental mutant variant of it; evolution often copies needless extra stuff, and minds so new as ours must contain a lot of that.)

Sometimes, though, we use music as a trick to misdirect our understanding of the world. When thoughts are painful we have no way to make them stop. We can attempt to turn our minds to other matters, but doing this (some claim) just submerges the bad thoughts. Perhaps the music that some call 'background' music can tranquilize by turning under-thoughts from bad to neutral, leaving the surface thoughts free of affect by diverting the unconscious. The structures we assemble in that detached kind of listening might be wholly solipsistic webs of meaninglike cross-references that nowhere touch "reality." In such a self-constructed world, we would need no truth or falsehood, good or evil, pain or joy. Music, in this unpleasant view, would serve as a fine escape from tiresome thoughts.

( Marvin Minsky, 1981)

Local Act 18:No goodnight sleep for me...

JIWA KOSONG...salah satu sebab nyer adalah kerana aku mahluk nocturnal...mcm dalam crita 'Underworld", just aku tak tau aku side "Death Dealer" or " Lycans"..hahahaha..start pkul 12 tgh malam, untill 6 pagi...usually aku akn segar bugar..anak mata besar-besar belaka...dan sangat aktif..from zaman skolah, till hbis skolah, smpai training nak masuk skolah blik, aku dicurse menjadi "nocturnal being"..tak tau actually a gift or a curse..Org cakap nikmat tdo malam aku dh kene tarik..sebab aku men"deny" perasaan ngantuk tatkala waktu malam, aku tidak memaksa diri aku nk tidur time malam...hmmmmm..agak susah nak pejam mata and force to sleep...melainkan siang tu aku keje buat jalan, or keje angkat konkrit, or kejar perompak..mybe aku akan tired enough to go to sleep..tp kadang-kadang tu tak menjadi gak...sbb even cm mane tired aku pun, if x bleh nak pejam mata...leceh gak.

Antara reason-reason yg contribute kepada "sleeping disorder" yang aku kenalpasti dan others
bgtau ak :

a) Otak aku berfungsi almost everytime...since aku fikir almost everything..so ble byk sgt fikir...cognitive load aku tinggi..jadi menyebabkan perasaan ngantuk tu tak boleh masuk dlm otak aku( betul ke teori nie?)

b) addicted to energy drinks...when it comes to assignment or study for test..aku akan take Livita, Redbull, Kopi Kapal Api yang Naim buat( Malaysia) and now kat Auckland, taste aku bertukar kepada Relentless, Mother, Demon, V, Lift Plus ( nama pun dh menakutkan, tpi xde alcohol k, just lot of caffine)..so, ble dh slalu sangat minum menatang2 nie time wat keje..efeknyer akan mnjadi long term...

c) aku igt lgi time aku sekolah rendah...aku tak tdo malam for almost 5 months..sumer nie sebab satu movie...Friday the 13th!!! Yg ad Freddy Kruger tu. Karektor Freddy tu memberi impak maksima dalam hidup aku time tu..jadi,tiap-tiap malam aku akan bukak lmpu bilik...baca komik or buat keje sekolah time tu..now aku ble aku tgk mvie tu, terpikir gak aku..asal bodoh sgt time kecik2 dulu..

d) sebab yg last nie agak sengal, coz ad sorang member aku ckp..and dier mcm sure sgt ngan statement dier yg berbunyi " Gua rasa lu dh kene rasuk ngan pontianak la...dier masuk dalam badan lu..sebab lu memekak je kat rumah dier, so dier geram ngan lu..." statement mamat nie mmg hilarious..mybe sbb aku slalu kuar mlm2 buta..tpi ble pikir blik...yg lain pun kuar malam gak..blik2 lepak senang je diorang tdo..hahaha..mybe yg rasuk aku tu Chief Pontianak kot.....hahahahaha...jadah!!

Smpai ble situasi ini akan menghantui aku..aku pun tak tau..coz aku dh cuba mcm2 initiatif..tp still susah nk tdo mlm...HOWEVER, aku dapat bnyak experienced from nite life nie...bukan exp yg bukan2...tp exp yg bnyak ajar aku elements of life....sbb ble malam menjelma...bukan just mata aku terbukak luas..malah hati dan minda aku sgt clear at things yg ble siang..its blur..not clear and sumtime aku x nmpak pun bnda tu( bukan hantu!!)...So, either its a gift, or a cursed..
I will never noe..but one thing yg aku tau..It's who I'am!

Local Act 17 : Black and White and always Square

Cuba korang took 5 minits and embrace pic2 diatas.....apa yg korang nmpak as a whole..combining sumer pics di atas menjadi satu elemen? 5..4..3...2.......1....times up!!!
Welcome to my world of black and white checkers...salah satu bentuk abstrak yg dipandang bosan, dull, old skool and yg paling best pernah aku dgr is black and white is warna " taik cicak"!!. Luckily aku blum jumpa a single ciciak kat auckland nie...if tak dh aku letak kat 'tinja' diorang kat sini.

Ad orang membuat statement kat aku few days back...and ayat dier lebey kurang cm nie...
" Apa2 yang ameer pakai mesti ad kotak2...lagi2 hitam putih"

Now biar aku bgtau korang sumer apa yg aku nmpak dgn dunia checkers hitam putih nie...
First thing first, warna hitam putih adalah warna contra, mempunyai dua sifat yg berbeza tapi bleh disatukan menjadi corak yg mempunyai personaliti...dan personaliti nie yg aku nmpak dalam diri setiap orang..hitam dan putih..mewakili negative dan positive, baik dan jahat, sumthing yg cuba disorokkan dan sumthing yang cuba ditayangkan..So, aku pada aku, setiap orang ad hitam and putih nie...the question is which one is more dominant?..Ad orang tend to show the white part of their life to the world...n hide totally the black, making them org paling baik a man can be...ad plak yg hitam dier lebih, hide the white...making him look jahat, sentiasa bermasalah...macho mybe, sbb jdi jahat...ad yg show both, trying to balanced it every now then...tp ad gak yg memilih..showing one color to a particular individual, example ble dgn A, only shows the good stuff tp with other, trying to be evil as can be...Then, org akan pandang this person as a "hipocritical bullshit", choosing sides, bias and whatever....but the bottom line is how this person justify why his view is such.. Hey, lets face it..not everyone is perfect..so it is up to us...which side yg kte nak tunjuk kat orang...and we can't help it if people want to see us based on side yg diorang want us to be...

And why with the checkers? Kotak2.? Coz life is not smooth as circle..it have "bucu"..problems, obsticles, which we faced every single day...and sides on the square pada aku is direction in our life...kiri kanan, atas bwh, depan belakang...mana kita nak pergi evryday? Sbb evryday, jalan yg kita lalu x akan sama dengan semalam or esok...coz it always change ikut arah mana yg kita pergi...n even kita ikut arah yg sama, the outcomes will always be diffrent...that is life of a square, unpredictable....

Local Act 16 : Memories in a place I called 'home'

Banyak gak sebenarnya gambar2 from Kota Tinggi yang ak simpan dalam laptop, tapi aku nak share a few pic yang ble aku tengok membawa seribu satu memori.....



Nie la antara member-member rapat aku time kat Kota...(yang mana xde dlm gmbar nie jgn terasa lak...gmbar lu org xde la)...aku igt lagi time nie bru lepas balik from interview kat IP Temenggong Ibrahim untuk menjadi seorang cikgu...(note gmbar aku telah dilindung oleh mamat yg menhisap straw)..Lepas je hbis interview, terus ak g lepak ngan diorang. Terasa macm ahli koperat pergi luch plak sebab aku pakai formal...dan yg lain2 mcm pekerja aku.hahahahah.These guys lah yang byk support aku in most everything yg ak wat...even jdi cikgu nie...even sumtime kne gak 'kondem' ngan diorang....mcm2 bnda aku dh buat ngan diorang..from "good" things, to "naughty" things to "bad" things to "celaka" things...hahaha..but apa2 pun...its them who shape me for what i am today...now masing2 ad life sendiri...but ak really missed the old days with them....So, thanks dudes~~

Sentimental value beb!

Berkilat betul syg aku nie.....

Sayang aku dinoda di depan mata aku sendiri

Satu lagi benda yang aku rindu sgt2..."kuda" lama aku. Honda C70 berplate JAQ 5517 is a real beauty...Byk gak aku meghabiskan duit "solek" motor nie... hanya mampu mencecah 80km/j walaupun dh hbis aku pulas throttle tu...dan sering kali tertinggal jauh oleh motor2 yang lain..aku still sayang lagi motor nie...sekarang "dia" tersadai dirumah lamaku di Kota Tinggi..menanti aku pulang untuk membelai2 ekzosnye, mengusap2 custom seatnyer,..dan menghidupkan nya kembali...walaupun ak pernah ad pengganti yg jauh lagi hebat darinyer (JJP6084), cinta aku pada JAQ 5517 masih lagi utuh..aku harap "dia" masih lagi menanti aku dirumah,,menunggu kepulangan ak( jangan la ibuku menjual nyer kepada besi buruk...Amin~~)




So, untuk member2 aku kat Kota Tinggi ( and C70 ak gak)....something untuk lu orang.....

~UNTIL THE END~

Weekends on young and angry streets
We meet, drink 'till trouble found us there
Living life as without a care
We've had our bouts, been black and blue
Its true, I've even gone to jail for you my friend
Bet your life that I'd do it again

(Until the End)

Don't change the way you think of me
We're from the same story
Life moves on, can't stay the same
For some of us, i'm worried

While some have gone their separate ways
Theres some still caught up with the past instead
But move on, you're missing most of your life
They say its hard to stay the same
When some fail, while other men seem to gain, my friend
I'll be with you here until the end

(Until the End)

Don't change the way you think of me
We're from the same story
Life moves on, can't stay the same
But some of us, some worry
We're all falling forward
With no signs of slow
And some moving faster
Thats all that I wanted
I wanted

You know its hard
Its passing by
Memories
Be out all night
To reminisce wont bring you back
Just look ahead and hold on tight
We're all falling forward
With no signs of slow
And some moving faster
Thats all that I wanted
I wanted

Don't change the way you think of me
Oh yeah

Oh yeah
Until the end
Until the end
Until the end

Local Act 15 : Faith

Faith by Seven Collar T-Shirt


Take a walk I'll hold your hands for now
It's happening, it's happening
Makes it hard to lose another night

I'll pretend that I'm a man for now
It's difficult, it's difficult
To soothe a wounded heart

Before you go, give me all of your love
Before you go, I'll give you all of mine

I'll drink water because my blood has dried
It's different, it's different
Than anything you've seen or heard before

Take a picture, hold that smile forever
I'll drink it everyday till it becomes another skin

Before you go, give me all of your love
Before you go, I'll give you all of mine

If it makes it easier
If it makes it easier to breathe

Fading away
Faith is a friend
You make it or break it

Fading away
Faith is a friend
You make it or break it

If it makes it easier
If it makes it easier
Wish it could be easier
I can't breathe
If it makes it easier
If it makes it easier to breathe

Fading away
Faith is a friend
You make it or break it

Fading away
Faith is a friend
You make it or break it


Listening to this song while taking a walk at 2 a.m really triggers a lot of things...